Tue 19 Jun 2007
False Start!
Posted by Bruce The Negotiator under Asking Questions, Humor, Internet Features, Negotiation, Negotiation Rules, The Negotiator
1 Comment
In some sports a false start is enough to disqualify a contender. The same is true in the human discourse often referred to as Negotiation. One error the ill-trained Negotiator makes before she ever gets to the Negotiating Table is to attempt to second guess or assume things about the yet undelved world of the Negotiating Complement’s side of the Negotiating Table. This bad habit is often the result of attempting to prepare for every variation of the anticipated negotiation. Such obsessive preparation is often the result of a Negotiator who is worried about what other people think and intends to “look good” at the Negotiating Table.
Knowledge is Power to the Negotiator on a scale like no other profession. Your words equal an increase in profit, position, opportunity, alliances, options and every other word that represents Resource. If you never learn anything else about Negotiating then please please hear this: A Negotiator’s duty is to inspire the Negotiating Complement’s information to flow and flow and flow. Get your Negotiating Complement talking by any means necessary. The metaphor that helps me remember what I’m doing in this part of a Negotiation is to think of myself as a Safe Cracker. My function is to get the Negotiating Complement to reveal his entire combination so that when I begin spinning the tumblers - the question of accessing all his resources is only a mater of how long I wish to draw the Negotiation out, nothing else.
I wish to qualify the point earlier about any means necessary. I don’t intend to arm any of you with ugly negotiating tools. The only time that I pull out my lumber-jack Negotiating tools is when the context is instantaneous and the rules of the game are already dirty and unforgiving - like catching the car thief hot-wiring your car or the guy that cuts in front of you at the movie theater. Hostile Negotiations are an essential element in the vast array of tools and resources needed by The Excellent Negotiator! that we will cover another day.
The opposite of an assumption in a Negotiation is Asking a Resourceful Question. If you find yourself thinking in terms of an assumption or if the next thing out of your mouth is derived from an assumption - STOP! Take a little more time and Ask a Resourceful Quesiton.
In my youth - I remember learning one thing and the excitement and the power of knowing one thing - like how to change the oil in my car was so great that it helped me halucinate the following logic: I know one thing and I learned that thing. Therefore - I can learn anything and the knowing of all things is simply a mater of learning it. Therefore I know all things though a few of those things are as yet unlearned. (which gets shortened to) I know all things.
Today I am 43 years and 1 day old. I’ve learned enough to know I hardly know anything at all. In my Negotiations I amp up my own ignorance. I want my Negotiating Complement to feel the great rush of vast knowledge and shine his rays upon my dull self…so I can then open up his safe and take what I wish. By the way - each model of car requires you to learn how to change the oil all over again and oh my god that’s such a great way to spend my time.
If you have a story about someone who Negotiates through Assumption (including yourself) or have a question about how to deal with assumptions, asking resourceful quesitons or anything else I may have covered, please feel free to leave a comment or write me at justask@yourownbestgood.com.
If you are interested in hearing more about Negotiations and would like to receive my Newsletter please fill out the form under my picture to the right. If you wish an even deeper grasp of Negotiations you might wish to sign up for my currently Free Apprenticeship Program.
What would happen if every time you opened your mouth you got exactly what you wanted? Have you Negotiated to your Own Best Good Today?
Bruce Burns the Negotiator!
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