Greetings Negotiators!,

Since I’ve had great success keeping up with this blog (blogging everyday….not)I’ve decided to launch a second blog. Actually my blog diversity is simply a way to maintain the integrity of each of the two areas that the blogs represent: 1)Negotiation (of course) and 2)Ho’oponopono. There may be some overlap once in a while but mostly I wish to let each site grow on it’s on. If you have an interest in the new site - fantastic and if you don’t fantastic!

LADIES AND GENTLEMAN
NEGOTIATORS
BRUCE BURNS
PRESENTS

TEXAS HO’OPONOPONO

AND

TEXAS HO’OPONOPONO MEETUP (#1 in google)

I love experiencing new things. Ho’oponopono is definitely different (and relatively new for me) than Negotiating.

I don’t usually talk about my Negotiating “failures” but since this one is in the spirit of the Winter Holidays (did someone say Christmas?) perhaps it will help someone out there. My wife and her family are like Christmas-a-holics. I’m not sure if there is a 12 step program for those kinds of people, but the first year I lived in Austin there were 3 Christmas trees in the house stacked neck deep in a 100 foot radius “under” each tree. I prefer to do more in the morning and less in the evenings - perhaps it’s my 40-something year old “gravity”. She just closed me on going to Hobby Lobby during rush hour traffic. I’d almost rather fold clothes (almost). So, if your wife or girlfriend closes you on a regular basis and you’d like to learn a few Negotiating turn-arounds for that or you just have a question - feel free to leave it in the comments section just beneath this post or write me directly at justask@yourownbestgood.com. If you are interested in a more intensive look at Negotiating and Negotiations you might consider applying for my APPRENTICESHIP PROGRAM (currently free).

I’ll see you at the Negotiating Table!

Bruce Burns, the Negotiator!

In the last few days I’ve been doing some significant Negotiating to My Family’s Own Best Good. My wife and I have been working to create (currently a surprise to the public) something new in our life. When we’ve completed the manifestation we’ll be glad to share our success (including photos). Because I’ve been Negotiating for my own personal best good, certain things have been brought home to me that I might overlook as a professional negotiator for other people and businesses.

One of the challenges that arises when you are negotiating purely for yourself or your loved ones is a connection the negotiator experiences that might be akin to being the chess piece that you are about to move (if that makes any sense). My wife of course has been participating in this process fully as well with her own understanding of negotiating (that reminds me of yet another aspect of Negotiations that I’d like to speak about.)

When we play chess and we decide to sacrifice the knight in order to expose the queen - we just do it because it is how we will win the game. However, when we are the king or queen and that knight that was just sacrificed is the family dog - your emotional connection to the negotiation in this chess metaphor can be like a giant tree fallen in the road before you, blocking the fruition of your intended negotiations.

What pollutes our Negotiating Excellence? The last time you thought you might negotiate then you found yourself backpedaling - what caused the backpedaling? What feeling do you experience when you step up to Negotiate and then suddenly it seems that negotiating at all was foolish? I don’t know what your answer is (though you are encouraged to share them with me via the comments section), but mine is fear. When I was a young man one of my favorite movies (I’m dating myself here!) was Dune. There is a scene in the movie where the “smart” guy speaks the following affirmation:

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

Fear is the Negotiation killer as well.  What happens to me when fear enters the equation is that I often forget what to say or do next.  How do I bring myself back?  What do I do to climb out of the dark hole of embarassment, guilt, shame and any of the other triggers of fear?  Well - if my fear hasn’t completely paralyzed me then I remind myself of Why any of us Negotiate at all, ever.  We have something to offer!  So, whatever you have to offer is truly the focus of a Negotiation for you, Negotiator!  You may ask 500 resourceful questions of the Negotiating Complement and his or her Targeted Resources, but if you cannot tie what they have to what you have then there is no Negotiation.

June is going to be the busiest month of my life in a long time.  I will do my best to post here daily.  I’m going to be working on more things to offer so as to become a greater resource for each of you.  Currently I offer a free Apprenticeship to those who want to really step-up their Negotiating Excellence!  If you are interested in receiving my Newsletter and/or joining my Free Apprenticeship Program then find the links to the right of this post and sign up today!

What have you done to Negotiate to Your Own Best Good?  What would it feel like to get whatever you wanted every time you opened your mouth?  Sign up today and find out!

Bruce Burns the Negotiator!