Because of the buzz - I’ve been keeping up with the Great Paris Hilton Suspended License case. I remember reading in the first few days of her sentence on the busiest blog on the internet (at that moment) about how people were crying ‘foul’ at the top of their lungs about preferential treatment. My comment at the time was that focusing on the crime of “driving with a suspended license” wasn’t even worth blogging about unless it happened to a VIP. So the focus wasn’t the crime though people might lament that it was - the focus was the status of the “criminal”.

What’s ironic is that in all walks of life people attract to them in many different ways preferential treatment all the time. Perhaps you are a regular at a restaurant and you are given a seat with a view and they know what you want so you don’t even have to order - they just bring the food. Doesn’t that feel good? What about parents who donate money to schools, colleges and the like - do their children get preferential treatment at those institutions? I’m sure thats factored into many wealthy parents decisions on such a choice.

How about politicians? Would you give up your fine seat at a concert or 5 star restaurant for the candidate of your choice? Even your neighbors - don’t we prefer one neighbor over the other - a polite and thoughtful neighbor gets preferential treatment over a noisy, busybody - don’t they? Did I hear someone cry unfair? Sure it’s unfair. Fair is a very abstract idea. Fair can also be considered a resource though because of it’s abstract nature it isn’t easy to acquire or hang on too.

In my own personal philosophy I’d rather help someone acquire the resource of fulfilling or compelling or joyous. I suppose the last question I might ask about Paris would be - who of you that had the resources of the Hiltons wouldn’t attempt to ease your child’s suffering if you could? A few of you wouldn’t - you’d want her to toughen up. Learn a little respect perhaps - but I think that most parents have a hard time watching their child suffer and would use their resources to transform that if they could.

Interestingly enough, Paris did get out for a brief time. She or her handlers understood the value of learning the rules of the game (see #12). Apparently one of the rules of the convicted is that you can get special consideration and preferential treatment for a medical condition. Some might call it an exception to the rules. Paris got a brief exception. Of course her and her handlers knowledge of the rules of the game weren’t perfect - seems the judge didn’t accept her exception.

In any negotiation knowing the rules of the game is an essential edge that can make or break some deals. One of the rules of internet marketing that I learned which has been quite beneficial is that you should research your competitors and then add 1 new thing they don’t offer. Find the crowd you want to be in (Internet marketing wise) and then create one new component to your discipline and stand out. Internet Marketing is a form of Negotiation. Each Marketer is negotiating for the interest, attention, traffic etc of a finite set. There are a large but finite number of people who utilize the Internet.

If there is a context you are in or know about that you’d like help with please feel free to write me at justask@yourownbestgood.com. I’d be glad to help you learn the rules of the game of any given context (for free) if I can. You are welcome to comment on today’s post at the comments section even if you don’t agree with me.

What would happen if every time you opened your mouth you were able to get what you wanted? What will you do to Negotiate to Your Own Best Good, Today?

Bruce Burns the Negotiator!